rage


right now i can only think of one thing. even without trying, i keep remembering what you said yesterday. your words keep on echoing.

when someone hurts me terribly, i tend to dwell on it for a moment and it makes me forget all my other worries in life. but it has been more than just a moment.

i am still hurting.

being called useless and...ugh, "inutil" is downright degrading. see, i can't even think of an english word that would give justice and equal meaning to that term!

congratulations. you did a very good job of making my other problems seem nothing. they all just seem to shrink.

now i don't even see the point in doing my best anymore. it's not gonna change what you think of me. i will always be mediocre to you. despite my achievements, i am not a winner. in my heart i know that it's not true, but you make me think and feel otherwise.

fine. you were angry. and half the time, people don't mean the things they say when they are angry. but i know you too well. i know that you meant what you said -- every word!

i know i'm not the best daughter you could ever have and you could probably say na hindi ako mabait na anak.

...pero mabuti akong anak.




==