~Nice, Naive and Beautiful~

2006-06-28T17:22:00.000+08:00

i guess there's no use hiding. no matter what i do or where i go, i will still be found. so i might as well post this:_perfectly tarnished_that's my new cyber turf.

2006-03-05T00:36:00.000+08:00

i am now putting an EOL to this blog.i'm surely gonna miss posting on this site.Adios!:)

2006-01-31T08:55:00.000+08:00

|| dreariness: tantrum without energy ||despite being on sugar high, i can still:1) fall asleep (oh my friends from AP can attest to this. kahit nasa gimikan, nakakatulog ako), and2) feel low spirited (some people can effortless ruin your mood) ...and both happened to me yesterday. i don't know which is worse -- starting the day with someone frustrating you or ending the day with someone hurting

2006-01-26T06:22:00.001+08:00

|| -f-r-a-g-m-e-n-t-s- || ver. 5you've gotten your big dream. now what?-- you dream for something bigger.>><><><<

2006-01-24T08:11:00.000+08:00
|| while ||three winksbreathlessan unforeseen awakeningsilently stalking tangible yet elusivelet me drownin this moment so pureunyielding resonatinglet me danceto the music only i can hearengaginghealingobsession to what i can holdjust for nowuntil i lose it againin three winks-- jarjar.10.04.05 --

2006-01-16T07:09:00.000+08:00
|| ...it was a different bug that bit me ||i was THIS close to deleting my entire blog. i was waiting for the blog bug to bite me. and when it didn't, i thought maybe i should just say goodbye to blogging altogether.but here i am again. :)to everyone who's been asking, you don't have to worry -- i am doing ok great.i have a couple of entries sitting in my draft box: :: my birthday entry (a

2006-01-05T09:03:00.000+08:00
and the journey continues...may your new year's day happiness linger throughout the year.have a spectacular 2006!

2005-12-20T01:33:00.000+08:00
it's Jarjar's Day! =)thank you Lord for another wonderful year. (will blog more later...)

2005-12-06T17:33:00.000+08:00
as i was stepping out of the car last night, a thought suddenly occurred to me...it would be nice to come home to a place with you in it.'twas a nice thought...i felt really good about it. :)

2005-12-04T10:16:00.001+08:00
|| December is here ||...and it's my favorite month. my birth month...i'm one of those atypical people who have 2 birthdays. if you don't know my birthday story, that means were not that close :Pholiday month... just like last year, i am looking forward to the holidays. i no longer experience that dreaded feeling approaching christmas. yey! pensive month... don't we all become contemplative

2005-11-27T10:45:00.001+08:00
|| beyond kodak moments ||i was reading Twin's blog and it made me contemplate on all of life's episodes i've had with my MM family. i have said it before and i will say it again ---- i had the best years in MM. yes, i've cried a lot, but back then, i also found myself saying countless times, "this is the life -- IT IS wonderful". all the joys and pains combined -- they were all worth it. looking

2005-11-21T09:39:00.000+08:00
|| pronounced || mind over heart. but in truth, you sometimes allow yourself to lead with your heart. only for a brief moment. just enough for you to become barefaced of what you are and where you are at that point.you'd be overcome by the soft but undeniable beating sound that the heart makes. and when the inevitable sensation rises, it leaves you unfastened.this is when confusion becomes

2005-11-20T09:29:00.000+08:00
|| kibitz, kibitz ||by now, you must have heard that i lost consciousness when i saw Constantine last week. hehe.tama ba kseng dumaan sya sa harap ko. aaaaaaah!!! i literally could not speak when i saw him. and i was just one foot away from him! oh well, i won't bore you with any more Constantine talk. basta, ok na ko. pwede nakong mamatay. :Dthanks Pims! :) next time ha magdala na tayo ng

2005-11-14T08:09:00.000+08:00
|| the 3 G's cycle ||it always happens this way.you feel depressed, you feel utterly sorry for yourself. all the world's miseries are on your shoulders. you attract all negative energies and you start whining.then you see another person with a much more terrible state you're in.suddenly, you feel ashamed of yourself. this line would come out of your mouth, "hey, i'm doing fine after all!" in a

2005-11-11T11:20:00.000+08:00
i can't believe i'm gonna see you in the flesh. i think i'm gonna faint.

2005-11-09T08:16:00.000+08:00
yesterday was enrollment day. one word: HELLlooong lines, sweat, heat, rude people, and hunger pangs. haaaay....what's new?oh!!! but there's something different about yesterday's enrollment......pink was everywhere! as in pink overload!!! people (yes, "people" -- girls, boys, gays, lesbos) were wearing pink left and right! my friends and i were counting the people wearing pink and we lost count.

2005-11-03T12:52:00.000+08:00
|| faze || i am half part of the solution and half part of the problem.i have the power to decide which one should outweigh the other. but it's not easy. any decision you make that concerns a person's feelings is never easy. i find myself looking at both sides with an equal amount of fear and sorrow. this is the dark cloud that's been following me around...

2005-10-31T08:31:00.000+08:00
|| not again ||it's the worst feeling when you are torn between keeping your distance or continuing to hang around with someone.it doesn't help knowing that either way, whether you avoid him or not, there will be a heavy and distracting feeling inside you.you need to stay away because things are getting too close for comfort, but then you don't want to, because you want to save the friendship.if

2005-10-27T10:22:00.000+08:00
|| a lovely disarray ||i woke up in the lush space where i don't remember what i've dreamed. but after three seconds or so, it suddenly flashed back to me. and i start having pep talks to myself. don't dwell on it. it's all in the past. it's time to move on.but i still dwell on it and defer moving forward -- at least for a moment. a moment so valued and true. no matter how strongly aware i am of

2005-10-23T20:14:00.000+08:00
|| delicate to handle ||knowing the truth can be as much a protection as it can be a curse to your life. there are times when you have to trade in a plate of lies for a plate of truth. you don't know which one is heavier to lift. but it doesn't really matter. either one is heavy and fragile.heavy and fragile. perfect burden.the moment you find out the truth, you hear something so strong. like a

2005-10-18T09:48:00.000+08:00
|| bone tired and craving for a rest day ||i am finally, finally, finally free of any connections to fitness first! only i can understand what a relief it has been! i cannot emphasize how happy i am. thanks Orange! :D that friggin' freezing fee was the stupidest thing anyone could ever spend money on. now, i'm done with it. no more shadows of fitness first! well, except for the new backpack

2005-10-14T07:59:00.000+08:00
|| survey from cher's friendster bulletin ||o minsan lang ako sipagin mag survey. this is what i do when i'm working overtime. hehe :D==Are you single, married, or taken?*** wlang "it's complicated"? haha!dati status ko taken. taken for granted...Are you in love at the moment?*** "in like"With?*** :) (duday nabitin ka ba? nde ko sinagot! haha!)Have you ever had a bad relationship?*** it was a

2005-10-13T11:43:00.000+08:00
|| feather touch ||every time i watch you, my eyes are filled with tenderness and ache. and my heart is filled with excitement and fear. all at the same time.i keep wondering what it is that connects us. breaks us. and reconnects us.i long to touch you. to have my fingers stroke your skin. to lightly feel the vein with blood rushing through it. it seems only by touch that i could be sure that

2005-10-11T06:57:00.000+08:00
now i can relaxwell, kinda. i still have to work and render ot.but but but....sem break has officially begun. :Di can now ditch my school books and resume reading novels. yey! :) i'm gonna buy a copy of The House of Spirits by Chilean journalist/novelist Isabel Allende.i've been hearing raves about the book. they say it's the most unexpected sensation since the emergence of Gabriel Garcia Marquez

2005-10-10T04:37:00.000+08:00
OT galore. ice cream galore.i've been working 8 days straight now. and i won't get a rest day until after 11 days. i've sacrificed my rest days to work overtime for a special project. i don't know why i agreed to render OT. hindi sya nakakatuwa. :( my colleagues and i are regretting our decision to work 7x a week. what the hell were we thinking???====cold rock ice cream is now here in manila!!!!

2005-10-07T08:46:00.000+08:00
yen and youbring me a banquet of reverieof naked, uncompelled vowa fool's paradise in your eyesa painting of misery in minecollecting the days so fewof shady kissesand borrowed timeyour hushed beautyimpairs me inwardlyblow mercy towards mei cravei ache-- jarjar.10.07.05 --==

2005-10-04T09:39:00.000+08:00
enraptureit is when you walk awaythat i let the taste return to my lipswhen you have freed the spell and passionthat immoderately touched every surface of mewhen only the humming of the sheets and the scent of your beingpenetrate my sensesthen, only then,can i selfishly absorb youuntil i, alone, possess you-- jarjar.10.04.05 --==

2005-10-03T18:30:00.000+08:00
second servingso everyone made it a point to tell me the big news. clearly, they think that i'm still hung up on you. oh.my.gawd.if you ask me, i thought it was funny. really. at kulang nalang sabihin nila saken, "jarjar, this is your chance!" i would've told them flat-out that i don't care. but some people have a ridiculous attitude of translating my nonchalance over the issue as bitterness.

2005-09-25T05:33:00.000+08:00
my life in a comai am ready for anything dangerous. but it turns out that that i'm just convincing myself that i am.in truth i still feel that something about me is stranded on a high dive, hesitant to leap into unknown waters. unsafe waters. maybe i just want to postpone the plunge awhile. i almost wish that my senses were dulled. i am stupefied all at once how the world is out there

2005-09-24T04:03:00.000+08:00
i pray that God would give me patience. because if He gave me strength, i swear i would have broken at least your nose. i would have used that strength for all the evil reasons.>><< i realized that it's hard to forgive an enemy.harder to forgive a friend.hardest to forgive a family member.==

2005-09-09T14:26:00.000+08:00
in your rhythmdespite steady pretenseand lavish masqueradenothingconceals the inner agonyin your presencelingersa whiff of comfortonly you captures mebreathes meand all is understood--jarjar.09.09.05--==

2005-09-06T16:07:00.000+08:00
Salam's Dayhappy birthday to the one and only legit princess i know! (that's not a nick or anything -- Salam is really a princess by blood)here's to more years of wonderful friendship that will give us more "do you remember the time when..." conversations. :D hehe. my life has truly been more exultant ever since we became friends.pano ba yan, one year to go nalang...at mag ppropose ka na. :Ppics

2005-09-04T15:35:00.000+08:00
if you have nothing better to do tomorrow night, tune in to Monster Radio RX 93.1 at 8:30 pm.listen closely, because one of the guests' voice belongs to someone you might just know. ;)==

2005-09-04T14:38:00.000+08:00
cocoyfor making me laugh...for drying my tears...for giving me comfort...for being my walking journal...for making fun of my being jumpy (tamang pang scary movie talaga ko eh!)...for the numerous times you've accompanied me to starbucks and 31st...for all the nonsense and wacky moments...for all the serious and enlightening talks...for making my 26th birthday memorable by bringing the entire MMIT

2005-09-01T10:52:00.000+08:00
chestnuts roasting on an open firepasko naaaa!!!!!!well, malapit na. :) it's that time of the year again. days seem to go by faster during the last 4 months of the year. at tatanda na naman ako ng isang taon.==

2005-08-31T23:54:00.000+08:00
does everyone really deserve a second chance?yes?then why am i depriving myself of that chance? i know i deserve it too. but there's this 4-letter word that's getting in the way....fear.i know. i have to overcome it.==

2005-08-27T23:38:00.000+08:00
i blog about happy moments too :)in case there was a big big BIIIIG favor you've wanted to ask from me...NOW IS THE PERFECT TIME TO DO IT.because most likely, i won't say no. i am, without a doubt, in the best of moods today. :) yep, i used the word best and not just good. it is THAT extreme that even if you treat me in the nastiest way possible, i would still give you my sweetest smile and wish

2005-08-24T14:08:00.000+08:00
tightly holding a rose...with thornsseeing you now as the person that you've become, i couldn't help but shudder.i once considered you as the only person there is to adore. but i've grown up. i'm not that little girl anymore that you could simply amuse with your ways. back then, it was so easy to make me see you as a hero.i know, i know, you've given me so much and there is no doubt about your

2005-08-21T19:35:00.000+08:00
uncertainty -- the good kindnow everything seems to blur in my mind.there's a gap. a small but very crucial gap that i need to fill.it was hours after midnight. i stared at the sky for a long moment. i tried to find peace...and answers. but all i saw were dark clouds -- covering the stars. i took it as a sign. maybe, just maybe, the answers are there, but it won't be presented to me now. just

2005-08-18T13:15:00.000+08:00
tidbitsi was excitedly telling my mom the plans i have for my career (naks! may direction na daw ang career ko!) -- short term and long term goals. i was talking non-stop and when i paused to get her reaction, this is what she said: "anak, baka makalimutan mo na mag-asawa".so much for career talk.>><

2005-08-15T22:24:00.000+08:00
maybe it's just human naturewhy is it that after getting something (or even someone) that i've wanted for so long, i suddenly give it all up. it's as if i never wanted it in the first place.more often that not, this happens to me.is this normal?==

2005-08-12T21:11:00.000+08:00
2 years na kameng blog ko. yey! :)buti pa kame ng blog may anniv. :P here's to more blogging years!==

2005-08-11T15:15:00.000+08:00
something i'm not proud to be..."c'mon. tell me.""are you sure?""yep.""i mean, are you sure you don't know why things are different now? and why i'm acting the way i'm acting towards you?""i don't know."*sigh* "what?""man i can't believe it.""can't believe what?""i can't believe how naive you are. you don't even know that you broke my heart.""HUH????"while i have not exactly given up on love,

2005-08-08T11:09:00.000+08:00
i grew up believing that i have sooo many friends.but then things happen.and i realize that i don't have so many of them after all.==

2005-08-06T18:12:00.000+08:00
a tribute to senator rocothis may be the first time that i am genuinely affected by the death of a politician. reading today's headlines made my heart sink.i voted for this man for president. he was the youth's favorite and only choice for president. he was my dad's choice too because he was a fellow bicolano. his intellect was unmatched. i really believed that the way his mind works is the kind

2005-08-01T14:49:00.000+08:00
the F wordis there any way that i could absolutely forgive -- AND literally -- forget?c'mon, i've forgiven you already. isn't that enough? :)ugh. do i need to have amnesia for this?==

2005-07-31T23:47:00.000+08:00
touched for the 21st timetonight i saw the last performance of UP Samaskom's Live Aids: Like a Virgin -- Touched for the 21st Time.it was hilarious. samaskom people are really talented. i can't believe i missed their 9 preceding editions. during the curtain call, it reminded me how it felt like to be a performer on stage.it made me miss my theater days.to my batchmates in SHS dramatics guild and

2005-07-30T11:19:00.000+08:00
-f-r-a-g-m-e-n-t-s-ver. 4you were the most difficult thing i had to go through in my life.>><><><><

2005-07-29T13:47:00.001+08:00
seems like i've dropped a bomb when people found out that i considered having a relationship with a girl.their mouths were left open. what was so shocking about that?seriously?and don't tell me that it's "sayang", because i really don't get it.==

2005-07-16T05:07:00.000+08:00
case of the exwhy do exes pose a threat to a current relationship? no matter how stable the couple is, once the subject of the ex is mentioned, expect somebody's eyebrows to raise.this is one of the reasons why it's best to keep your distance from your ex. while i'm becoming open to the idea of remaining friends with an ex, i don't want to be the cause of an argument between him and his gf. she

2005-07-09T02:23:00.000+08:00
unguidedmy soul is wandering.i am taking my time; slowly trying to discover the meaning of this. and while my soul seems to be lost, it refuses to be found.at least, not now.==

2005-07-06T10:43:00.000+08:00
my silver screenthere is something major happening to everyone around me. things are unfolding before my eyes. and everything is just not good news.heartaches. divorces. pains. accidents. and even death.if i am indirectly affected, what more for these people who actually experience them?i hope there was something more i could do than hold their hands or pray for them. these tragedies are

2005-06-17T15:28:00.000+08:00
launch padthe past 2 weeks have been crazy. toxic, yes. but i am thankful to be doing something i enjoy. the more i am exposed to work, the more i want to put myself out there. i want to challenge myself at every turn and be amazed at what i can accomplish. the defeat never lies in the outcome of the event, but rather in not being able to step up to the plate.working hard gives me the opportunity

2005-06-02T21:14:00.000+08:00
seeing the good sidei now know why God made me a good listener. it is safe to say that no one would understand you better than i do.as much as i love you and enjoy being with you, hearing you rant about your frustrations is becoming a task. for me. for you. i cannot remember the last time we had a normal and happy conversation.and here you go again, letting it all out. no, i don't think there's

2005-05-29T20:43:00.000+08:00
jarjar is back in businesssee? i knew it. i have a shot in becoming an events organizer. :Pi got myself a temporary job -- im working my ass off for a major company launch. i didn't realize how big the event was until i saw the guest list. whoa!!! vip kung vip!!! hello gma!yes, i get stressed out once in a while, but what the heck. i'd rather work than be idle. after all, THIS is what i wanted.

2005-05-27T10:45:00.000+08:00
you have to spell it out for themi've been trying hard to get her attention but she's not very responsive. kahit lambingin ko, wla pa ren.haha! pare, she's no longer into you. huh? she's over you.di nga?men are so naive. either that, or it's because their ego are so fragile.and poor women have to deal with both. it's tough. most of them don't appreciate my being frank.==

2005-05-23T22:18:00.000+08:00
bring it onquiet. stress free. worry free. simply relaxing.things are going pretty well. nothing major troubling me. but i'm sure as hell that this isn't gonna last. it's like i'm just waiting for the next unfortunate event. i am holding my breath until that day comes. and when it does, i would gladly welcome the challenge.==

2005-05-19T11:38:00.000+08:00
"ikaw yung tipong sinasamba at pinapakasalan."not quite.ako yung sinasaktan at iniiwanan.==

2005-05-18T19:37:00.000+08:00
weekend reporti ended up sulking last friday night. both of my plans didn't push through. my friends had to cancel at the last minute.i think im gonna start believing that friday the 13th is doomed.>><< Master Lee's birthdaysaturday was better -- or, at least until OC and i got lost on our way home from the party. we reached the province of angono??!?!? i'm not sure where (kse nga naligaw kme eh

2005-05-13T11:02:00.000+08:00
it was never really about mei gotta have to stop worrying about other people too much. half the time i am blaming myself that i haven't done all i could as a friend. it makes me guilty. even if i don't have anything to do with their misfortunes, i start to think that i am partly at fault. i let the stupid idea nibble at the edges of my mind. this is crazy. i can only do so much to help them.

2005-05-07T14:43:00.000+08:00
a different kind of name gameif you could say his name without feeling anything, it means you're over him.-- words from a dear friend, Pachuch. spoken a few months back.she was in fact referring to her ex -- that she could say his name without a trace of bitterness, pain, or anything that makes anyone sad over a past relationship.at that time, i followed what she said. and so i uttered his

2005-05-05T10:34:00.000+08:00
you cannot escape your past.but you can make peace with it and move on.-- quoted from Traci Lords==

2005-05-03T05:04:00.000+08:00
blossoming beginnings in Maythe best kind of triumphant feeling is when you've just recovered from a very low moment in your life.i am currently enjoying that feeling. :) no other prize could match that.pure joy.pure freedom.pure love.i am an absolute winner....all because of Him. thank you Lord. :)==

2005-04-30T23:39:00.000+08:00
best before april 30, 2005i am now officially a bum. my resignation is effective today. i made a couple of visits to the office during my 2-week terminal leave (yep, i can't get enough of sykes!). one in particular was quite disturbing. it was when i saw a newbie already occupying my station. technically, it was still MY station until yesterday. wouldn't mind if someone was already using my

2005-04-28T17:48:00.000+08:00
unsteadyi never thought it was possible to admire and pity the same person at the same time.i almost regret knowing about her greatest weakness. i felt like i wasn't ready for it. it was like discovering the tiny cracks of a perfectly molded figurine. it was both a disappointing and an awakening moment for me. it gets tiring when everyone around you thinks that you're this very strong person. and

2005-04-27T21:23:00.000+08:00
fresh from boracay!it was my second trip to the islands of boracay. it was sunny this time around. unlike last year, i never got to see the sun rise because there was a nasty storm. and i should have witnessed the beautiful boracay sunrise this time, but i didn't. my waking hour was always at 7am. :) anyhow, this trip was definitely worth it. i was extremely rejuvenated. for a few days, my life

2005-04-21T09:15:00.000+08:00
living a bum life...is not for me.i've been waking up at 3am since monday morning and the first thing that comes to my mind is, "oh god, i wanna work again". so shoot me.anyone would trade places with me right now. vacation galore, yeah. since my training in clark has been postponed, my boracay trip is pushing through. yey! :)i'm excited for bora. who wouldn't be? but i still keep thinking of

2005-04-13T23:52:00.000+08:00
there are only rare moments when i am truly at a loss for words; when i am overwhelmed with emotions that the only thing i can do is let my tears fall.and that kind of rare moment happened when i read this: Jarjarthanks Nemo. =) i am deeply moved. i will save my message for you on my last day. sa friday mo na ko ulet paiyakin. love you dear! *sweet hugs*p.s.thanks for the wonderful work of art on

2005-04-11T23:43:00.000+08:00
5 days to go...and i will be a day walker again.surprisingly, today i don't feel any bit of sadness in me. but i'm sure things will be different on my very last day at work. just thinking about writing my farewell letter gives me a hard time sleeping. hehe.there's this exit interview questionnaire form given to me by HR. one of questions was: If you were given the power to influence anything

2005-04-08T06:45:00.000+08:00
suddenly i had this thought: what if i had never met you?ugh, do i really want to know the answer to this? :/==

2005-04-05T22:42:00.000+08:00
stained angelyou think the worst part is over? making a decision is just the first step.what's more difficult is sticking to it. i feel like i'm torturing myself just because i'm trying too damn hard to do what's right. how come doing the wrong thing is always easier?why can't i just be evil and get away with it?==

2005-04-03T15:05:00.000+08:00
he will be missedPope John Paul II 1920-2005the Pope i've known all my life -- he was elected Pope months before i was born. perhaps any Catholic was moved by his death. in an odd way, i think my faith even became stronger after the incident. reminiscent of the World Youth Day in Manila, i only saw the Pope the size of my pinkie finger for i was stationed miles away from the stage. even then, i

2005-03-30T23:30:00.000+08:00
the countdown beginsi'm still not talking to my dad. i'd love to give him the cold treatment, but i simply don't have the chance. i don't get to see him. thanks to my work schedule, i get home when he's already gone. all these years of working in a call center, acquiring a nocturnal lifestyle has practically made me just a boarder in my own house.if there's one good thing that this resignation

2005-03-27T07:35:00.000+08:00
rageright now i can only think of one thing. even without trying, i keep remembering what you said yesterday. your words keep on echoing.when someone hurts me terribly, i tend to dwell on it for a moment and it makes me forget all my other worries in life. but it has been more than just a moment. i am still hurting. being called useless and...ugh, "inutil" is downright degrading. see, i can't

2005-03-24T07:04:00.000+08:00
life is not all about what you make it.for most part, it's actually how you take it.C O P I N G is the key.>><

2005-03-23T04:46:00.000+08:00
my new crush :Dshe's the newest image model for bayo. but i can't find her name anywhere. :(==

2005-03-22T23:40:00.000+08:00
how do you spell your name? #flickrWords .flickrImg { float: left; }

2005-03-21T13:46:00.000+08:00
this is soooooo true: Do something right, no one remembers.Do something wrong, no one forgets.it's a harsh world out there. :|==

2005-03-18T22:28:00.000+08:00
semester is finally over. this sem has proven to be more difficult that the last one. more units, more requirements. and i feel more tired and sleepy most of time. one professor asked me if i am getting any sleep, or that if i actually have parents who are taking care of me. huh?am i that harassed looking that i'm beginning to look like an abandoned daughter? kawawa naman yata ako. :/but i am

2005-03-13T08:53:00.000+08:00
i'm hoping that someday, somehow, i'll find it in my heart to forgive you. there's just one problem...it's very difficult for me to forgive...and forget. the thought of what you did just pops into my head everytime i see you. and it makes me feel sick.i've heard you say sorry, and i know you mean it. but God knows that you gotta do better than that.==

2005-03-08T22:21:00.000+08:00
caught off guardnothing ever prepares you for rotten situations in your life. no matter how strong or courageous you are -- or even if you've long expected it -- when it finally happens, IT JUST HITS YOU. point blank.and you are left staring at the big picture. dumbfounded.BUT...i am not talking about me. although it may have happened to me at some point.this is about a friend.kenzo is caught in

2005-03-02T07:16:00.000+08:00
uncomingit's getting ugly. i am finding more reasons to leave this job. despite the big opportunity that has been presented to me, i am still not convinced to stay. i know i am a fool to pass this up, but i really cant commit to something if my heart's not into it. yes, the opportunity may be a big thing, but this big thing has been outweighed by the small ones that have really made me start to

2005-03-01T23:50:00.000+08:00
happy birthday kooka.you are a wonderful person. more than you can ever imagine. i wish you could see that in you. start believing in yourself. it's about time. your crown has already been made. wear it with pride. love you!==

2005-02-26T10:53:00.000+08:00
i wish i could make myself fall out of love. right this moment. but i can't. at least i can't hasten the process. i have to let it happen naturally.naturally....just like the way i fell in love with you.==

2005-02-25T09:20:00.000+08:00
life is good. i shouldn't complain. i must remember that i have more than enough and i shouldn't be taking things for granted.>><

2005-02-18T08:02:00.000+08:00
a life being towed awayover and done with it.i'm referring to the occasion that hallmark invented: V day. ;)i ended up cancelling my friendly (naks) date due to a very disturbing situation: car engine trouble.and it didn't end that day. the following morning, on my way home, the car was still behaving badly and it had to be towed.waiting for the tow service and for my brother to pick me up took

2005-02-12T09:21:00.000+08:00
eeewww...valentine's day na sa monday. eeew eeew eeew!i am so preoccupied with work and school projects that the only time i am reminded of feb. 14 is when i peek into my planner -- which is like everyday. ugh! why did starbucks have to make it an important day. why?! why?! why?! pano naman mga losers katulad ko? potah naman eh!i was supposed to join a friend to boracay next week. but training

2005-02-11T23:56:00.000+08:00
when the moment feels righton the day that i submitted my resignation letter to my manager, i got a call from HR that same day. HR scheduled me for an interview for a position that God knows how much i want. it was for the same position i applied and got accepted to more than a year ago. salary issues got in the way and i never got to transfer. now i'm given the chance to reapply and i have to go

2005-02-07T23:56:00.000+08:00
note to thy self: give everything. expect nothing. and i mean nothing. that's one way to avoid getting hurt.

2005-02-03T05:09:00.000+08:00
kababawan lang... a recent phone conversation with HC. HC: so was there anything special that happened? anything!?!??! (desperately seeking for an answer) me: erm....nope. nothing. HC: ok. after 5 mins of chit chat -- on a totally different topic, he blurts: HC: so you don't remember that we kissed? me: whaaaaaattt???? HC: yeah. we did. me: oh. (totally embarrassed) really... HC:

2005-01-28T04:01:00.000+08:00
if i could let you read one article, it would be this: UNSENT i especially like the last part.

2005-01-26T03:37:00.000+08:00
"i would love to see a guy cry because of you. for a change." i think i want that too. for a change. *sigh*

2005-01-25T22:33:00.000+08:00
i am suffering from upper respiratory tract infection. :( i should have rested more. i decided to go back to work today. i feel terrible.

2005-01-19T07:46:00.000+08:00
after all that i've been through... ...how did i end up looking like the bad guy? i was not the one who had a crappy behavior. i should have been a bitch to you. i know i wouldn't regret it.

2005-01-18T23:23:00.000+08:00
uh-oh..this can't be good i don't know what i'm doing here. earlier, while driving to work, i badly wanted to make a u-turn and go home. i am not physically and mentally fit to work today. not to mention the fact that i am soooooo not in the mood. so why am i here? have i created a workaholic in me??!?!? i hope not. for someone who had a long weekend (yesterday was Martin Luther King Day

2005-01-12T08:10:00.000+08:00
once again the curtains close colors turn to black i rest my gaze to the empty space it's huge enormous intimidating the room becomes bigger and scarier for just one person as the voices echo and leave a nasty mark, so do the dismals in my life i yearn for what is pleasing for what is right but the question remains for who? i seek for comfort for pure joy i wait until someone shares but

2005-01-02T15:55:00.000+08:00
"sometimes you just have to follow your gut feeling." "key word: SOMETIMES." -- lines from Ed tv show >><< first sunday of the year and my dad just had to make me feel like a bad daughter. again. instead of sulking in my room, i immediately prepared myself to go somewhere. i found myself driving to Ortigas. this is one of the rare moments when i want to stay in the office. sarap.

2004-12-31T10:22:00.000+08:00
2004 has been one of the best years in my life so far. yes, there are many events that i would want to happen again. *big smile* thank you for being a part of my 2004 history. :) cheers! "Life is made of moments."

2004-12-29T07:49:00.000+08:00
what made me smile today: Nocturnal and Nice :) visit their home page too! hehe...kakaaliw. :D

2004-12-28T13:53:00.000+08:00
bull's eye there could be another reason why i am unhappy, unsettled, and unfulfilled at times. i may be pursuing the wrong dream. wrong goal. yeah, even the wrong person. everything is just not right for me. but how can you actually be wrong with your desires? aren't they supposed to bring you joy? so what the hell is wrong??? is there a way to tell that you are aiming (or not aiming) for